Angie's Youth and Young Adult Ministry Blog

Pancakes!

It's Shrove Tuesday. Fat Tuesday. Mardi Gras. This day always takes me back to growing up in Gibson, Iowa (population: 75-ish) where everybody would congragate at the church to eat pancakes and celebrate the beginning of Lent. Same thing happened when I started my ministry in Gilman, Iowa--everybody gathered at the church to eat pancakes and celebrate the beginning of Lent on this otherwise ordinary weekday. So what am I doing tonight? Going to Paul's church in Urbandale--Covenant Christian--to eat pancakes and celebrate the beginning of Lent.

What else am I doing today? Laundry, for sure. We pulled in the driveway at midnight last night after a week of brain-study and skill-building in San Diego. While I'm doing laundry, though, I'm going to read: some brain information (trying to remember and sort out what I've been working on this past week) and some poety (nothing practical here--just something good for the soul). And then I'm going to walk the dog, clear out some cobwebs and then sit to reflect on what Lent means for me at this point in my life. I'm not giving anything up this year for Lent--I'm not sure that giving something up is what God is asking me to do. I will, though, look at what will bring me closer to God and lead a lifestyle more in line with what God intends for us.

And then I'm going to put on pants with an elastic waist-band and eat lots of pancakes with a great community of friends.

Happy Fat Tuesday.

Speaking of "Focus"...

If it is the job of the preacher/teacher to help people focus on living lives that are congruent with what God has intended--lives that are full and rich and rewarding and whole and all of that stuff--then why do so many preachers/teachers use "should" "ought" "you better" and "I want you to" (or worse yet..."God wants you to") language in their sermons and teaching moments?

Seems to me that if we (and yes, I'm including myself in the "language-abuser" category) want people to listen and grow and engage in faith, the use of non-threatening language (see the "focus" blog entry for more information) is the way to go...unless, of course, our objective is to help people rebel against the church.

People need to wrestle with their faith. They need opportunities to question, talk, engage and own their relationships with God and each other. We--as church leaders--should be listening more and talking less, asking questions instead of providing answers (and lectures).

Just another thought.

Focus!

Our five senses are working all the time. Sight, smell, sound, taste and touch--we're constantly pulling information into our brains. Scientists estimate that a human brain is receiving over 10,000 bits of information every second you are awake. So, if all of that information is pouring in at all time, how does your brain know where to put it's focus? Hmmm.

It's a part of the brain called the Reticular Activating System (RAS) that sorts it all out. The RAS takes in all of the stimuli and lets you know which things you need to be consciously aware of and which things can be unconsciously worked on. Cool...but so what?

Here's why it's important to know about the RAS: what you say to others can provoke either a positive or negative reaction based on the language you choose to use. A quick example: "I want you to listen very carefully". If these words are said to a teenager, the phrase "I want you to..." is what the RAS will focus on. Instead of "listen very carefully" the brain has already started to process the fact that you are the one in control (implied by the statement). Teenagers don't like to be controlled, so their brains are telling them to rebel: don't you dare pay attention! If the objective is to have someone pay attention, a more effective phrase might be: "Please pay attention--this is important" or even "Cool! Did you know..."

If getting people to focus on what you are trying to say is important to you, avoid trigger words such as:  "You should..." or "I want you to..." These phrases often make people feel defensive and puts them in a rebellious state. Try using words like "Let's..." and "We can..." instead of "should" and "ought". Inclusive, non-directive statements make people actually want to participate!

Just something to think about.

OK, this isn't as easy as I thought.

This afternoon's exercise: put all we've learned about giving good/effective presentations to practical use. Sounds easy enough. It's practical. Common sense. Should be a piece of cake. Intuitively I know this stuff.

NOT.

I took my materials outside for this exercise, sat down with a piece of paper and a pen, and started to think about worship: how do we construct worship so that people are engaged, connected, learning and growing? I picked Saturday worship apart...and when I started to put the pieces back together I got stuck. Crap. And that's just worship--I can't wait to pick apart confirmation. Ewww.

It's scary. And exciting. The opportunity to take a look at what we do and why we do it an evaluate how we can make it better is always a gift. As I come up with ideas and suggestion, I'll write them here. Should be interesting.

It's tough...

...to be in San Diego, sitting in the sun, learning about how to give effective presentations. But somebody has to do it. :)

I'm on lunch break right now--it's day #3 of "Presenting with the Brain in Mind" and I must say I'm amazed at how much I already know, how much I really don't know and how often I give presentations (sermons, classes, etc.) by acting on auto-pilot and not thinking everything through. Right after lunch--in about 45 minutes--I will have the opportunity to demonstrate my leadership style and then sit for "gems and opportunities" from the audience. Wish me luck!

This stuff, though, isn't just for those of us in the business of giving presentations. It's basic, everyday, "how-can-I-be-in-good-relationships" social skills. Listen. Pay attention for non-verbal feedback. Frame. Frame. Frame. Be clear. Crystal clear. Give only one instruction at a time. Use visuals. Make everything you say and do count. And don't talk too much.

Amazing.

Anyway, it's a great trip. An excellent class. Good weather, too (65 and sunny today). Better go prepare for the presentation. I'll let you know how it goes.

Preaching, Brains and San Diego

Paul is the latest in our house to get hit with the 'bug'--sinus infection, cough, fever. Gross. Saturday afternoon he knew he'd be too sick to preach--so I was able to pinch hit for him on Sunday morning. Very fun. A good break in sabbatical.

It was a good way to get my head in the game for class this week, too. We are now in sunny (but chilly) San Diego for Rich Allen's "Presenting with the Brain in Mind" class. In today's session (the first of five), we had a great review of the basics in teaching/presenting--a great reminder for me to put more energy and effort into the details of preaching and teaching.

Did you know that adults--under the very best of circumstances--can only fully concentrate and focus on a speaker for about ten minutes (give or take)? And that's under the best of circumstances (good lighting, comfortable room temperature, comfortable seating, pleasant surroundings, etc.). What does that mean for the average sermon or classroom lecture, then? It means we need to be changing things up every now and then to keep people engaged. Remember--that time is for adults who are trying to focus. Take five minutes or so off of that time for the average student.

Another important tidbit--music is incredibly important in keeping people focused. Music as they enter the space, background music as they work, music to change their states and music as they leave.

Lots to learn. Lots to do.

Very cool.

Presenting and Preaching: 7 Deadly Mistakes

I'm reading "Trainer's Bonanza: Over 1000 Fabulous Tips and Tools" by Eric Jensen. It's another prep piece for my brain training next week ("Presenting with the Brain in Mind"). Pages 4 & 5 caught my eye: "7 Deadly Presenter Mistakes". Seems that they make sense not only for business presentations but for preaching and teaching in the church, too. See what you think about these 7 big mistakes:

1. Too much information. You ought to be able to summarize your whole talk in just a few words.

2. Talking only about content, not people. Even in the most technical presentations, the audience enjoys hearing the human side of the story. Make it a humane presentation about content--not a technical presentation about details.

3. Treating audience members with disinterest. Gain insights about the make up of the audience and then use examples that match their experience.

4. Inadequate preparation. Before your talk, go through all of your materials and ask yourself if they reflect the interests of the audience and if they are first class. If not, it's time for an update.

5. Lack of attention to the opening. Your audience will make up their mind in the first 30 seconds about whether you are worth listening to or not. Make sure you are clear, crisp, enthusiastic and approachable.

6. Too technical or full of jargon. Make sure you use metaphors, analogies and examples that make even the most complex subjects more accessible.

7. Lack of interaction with the audience. Make eye contact. Be enthusiastic. Get out from behind the lectern often. Use gestures. Use humor. Involve the audience by asking for their opinion. Do a survey or ask if a particular event has happened to them. Get them involved and they will remember your presentation better.

Back to work...for a moment, anyway

There is no better way to kick off Valentine's Day than to spend an hour on the phone with the UCC national office discussing confirmation while you are on sabbatical. Really.

I love confirmation (that's the tie to Valentine's Day--love and passion). I love the system we use at Plymouth (Head to the Heart from Faith Inkubators). And I want to share this system with other churches because what we are doing at Plymouth UCC is making a difference not only in the lives of our 7th and 8th graders, but it is infecting the whole church--families are talking about faith issues, adults are connecting with kids, students are having fun and learning...and they are inviting their friends! So I contacted the national office to let them know what we are doing.

Hopefully this conversation will lead to a partnership and that partnership will lead to new UCC materials and those materials will lead to church transformation and church transformation will lead to church growth and church growth will lead to healthier families and healthier families will lead to world peace. But one thing at a time...and today that one thing is an hour long conversation on why I believe what we do and say matters in the life of a 13 year old.

Cool.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Practical Compassion

In her book "The Spiral Staircase", Karen Armstrong says:
"If your understanding of the divine made you kinder, more empathetic, and impelled you to express this sympathy in concrete acts of loving-kindness, this was good theology. But if your notion of God made you unkind, belligerent, cruel, or self-righteous, or if it led you to kill in God's name, it was bad theology."

Good thoughts, especially in light of all the world's events. Does your faith make you more compassionate, more loving, more kind? Or does it make you feel superior to and intolerant of those who are different than you?

A Trip Down Memory Lane

It's nostalgia weekend around here. Paul and I were talking about my "Joy of Cooking" blog and how good it is--at least for awhile--to have me home, putting family first and doing things together for a change (normally our lives run at 100mph in opposite directions). This started a whole conversation about things that we loved as kids: hanging out with friends, eating Swanson's pot pies, Grandma Janet's orange juice made from concentrate...things like that.

So we're taking a trip down memory lane here this weekend and surrounding ourselves with old comforts. So far we have gone to a 2nd/3rd grade basketball game (go Gracie!), walked the dog, made orange juice (from concentrate--just like grandma's), gone bowling, laid on the couch and watched the Olympics, caught up with friends and family in person, by phone and e-mail. We've even dreamed a little bit with each other: "Would you rather..." and "What if...", just like we did with our friends when we were kids.

It's been fun. I highly recommend it. Whatever you are doing this weekend, stop for a minute and think about something that you loved as a kid--something that gave you comfort. And then indulge!

This afternoon: macaroni and cheese. From scratch (with Velveeta, no less...). It's a good thing.