Angie's Youth and Young Adult Ministry Blog

Brainy Tidbits

Malcolm Gladwell says "Look at the world around you. It may seem like an immovable, implacable place. It is not. With the slightest push--in just the right place--it can be tipped."

He's right. And understanding how people tick, what makes them act and react, what gets them excited and what scares them, is how you know where to push to make the world tip.

"Leading With the Brain in Mind" by Dickmann, Stanford-Blair, and Rosati-Bojar addresses the issue of "brain-tipping": how people act and react, why people get defensive and excited, what empowers people and what neuters them. It's not 'hit-or-miss', voodoo, slight of hand, manipuative tricks that they offer. It is brain-science, what-makes-us-tick studies that they offer so that people can work together with as little threat, conflict, and fear as possible.

An example: methods of acknowledging people's emotions in any process. We all have them. Ignoring them is a huge mistake.

And another: self-care is critical for anyone. As a leader (whether at home or at work), the best thing you can do is take care of yourself: exercise (for air that feeds the body and mind), lots of water (hydration is key for body functions and brain health, too), music, laughter, trying new things.

A good read for those of us who want our relationships to work and would like to understand why and how that can happen.

And they grow up...

I realized yesterday how quickly time flies: one of our kids is in college, one is a senior in high school, the other is a junior. At this point in life, we can sit down and have conversations about things--the tug of wars are starting to go away (they aren't gone yet...but are less frequent, anyway). The best part of our conversations: sharing our highs and lows. The ritual of sharing our highs and lows has become, well, a ritual. Not just a way to get into conversation. A real ritual.

We started with highs and lows just a year or two ago, when Faith Stepping Stones became a part of our lives. It would have been great to have started our rituals of blessing and prayer and reflection when the kids were little, but we didn't. Instead, we started when we learned the tools: when our kids were in high school. Not ideal, not exactly embraced with open arms by everyone, but we stuck with it. And you know what? It worked. It works.

It's never too late to start a ritual in your life, especially when that ritual involves prayer and relationships with others and with God.

One more thing to be thankful for this Thanksgiving weekend.

Thanksgiving

Today is Thanksgiving Day. Some traditions about this holiday don't change: the Macy's Day Parade, football in the afternoon, reflections on what we're thankful for, prayers for those who go without.

And some things do change: beef and noodles instead of turkey (a long story), marriage and the question of "where do we spend the holiday?" People get divorced, their children grow up and loved ones die. In the midst of all of the change, we are still thankful and grateful for God's presence in our lives, each and every moment.

I'll be sharing this day with my family: Ben (home from college), Bailey (home from her first college visit), Hannah, Paul, my dad, his wife and her mom. We'll be eating the now-traditional beef and noodle dinner, remembering Thanksgivings-past, and reflecting on all we are thankful for: health, home, friends, family, changes in life, the opportunity for moments like this.

A good day. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.

Volunteer Care

Thomas McKee has a free website called "Volunteer Power". There, he offers these suggestions when taking care of volunteers in an organization. Great ideas!

The best, most effective way to motivate volunteers is to create a culture that stimulates the inner motivation of each volunteer.  The following ideas are ways to create a volunteer culture that says, “Thank You.”

Positive Gossip

When someone says something good about a volunteer, I tell that volunteer about it.  It almost seems to get more reinforcement value second hand.  The other day I was talking with a business colleague, and she told me how much she appreciated Gary’s leadership.  And then she said, “Wow, I don’t know how Gary does it.  He not only puts in hours at work in a very stressful job, but is so involved in our Rotary community projects.  Gary is a leader that I really respect, and we all know that he will never let us down.”  The next week I saw Gary and my first words to him were, “Hey, we were just talking about you last week.”  And then I told Gary what my friend had both said about him. 

Motivation principle:  Wow, people were saying nice things about me.

Huddles

Remember the roll call on the TV show of the 80’s “Hill Street Blues”?    A huddle is like the roll call.  It is a quick, stand-up meeting just before the volunteer shift or duty.  The purpose of the huddle is to go over assignments, update communication, introduce new volunteers and most important take the opportunity to recognize a very specific action of a volunteer.  Be very specific such as . . .

“Today I want to say thank you to Tom for his special work yesterday.  He came in early and put together all of our packets for our session today.  That is so Tom.  Thanks a bunch for all you do to help us (state your mission).”

Motivation principle:  Constant communication.  Without feedback, I don’t know where I stand.

Thanking the Family

Write a note to the family members of a volunteer thanking them for their support of the volunteer, acknowledging the good work their family member has done and explaining the importance to accomplishing the mission of your organization.

Motivation principle:  Encouragement (and discouragement) from family members is huge.

Logo Apparel

Provide all of your volunteers a top quality (don’t scrimp) shirt, sweater, T-shirt, sweatshirt or cap to wear when they volunteer.  This not only provides a uniform, professional look, but volunteers will wear their apparel in public—advertising your mission.  One caution, make sure that only volunteers get the apparel.  Make them special.

Motivation principle:  Volunteers are cool.

Food

Provide a special break room for just volunteers and make sure that you have plenty of snacks (Krispy Kreem, fruit, coffee, juice, soft drinks).  Keep the refrigerator full.

Motivation principle:  Food is always a motivator.

Restaurant Gift Certificates

Restaurant gift certificates for special recognition are always winners.  And they don’t have to be to the most expensive restaurant in town (although that is nice) but even a $5.00 Starbucks or Ben and Jerry’s gift card to all of the volunteers is a great thank you that helps the volunteer feel appreciated.  And by the way, sometimes these places will donate gift certificates to your organization—because they know that when the people come to cash them in, they usually spend more.

Motivation Principle:  Food plus special recognition. 

Dreaming Big, Part I

Today was a day for dreaming: I had the luxury of spending time with my friends and colleagues at Faith Inkubators. We had lunch and talked. We spent time at the computer looking at a new way to do Sunday School. We had coffee and talked some more. We did a pod-cast (the link will be coming soon to this site). We laughed a lot. It was good. Very good.

More details will come soon, so keep your eyes and ears open. Stepping Stones. Confirmation. Sunday School, even. Seven days a week, kids singing and dancing and talking to their parents and reading scripture and knowing they are loved.

Radical.

Grandparents and the Stones

The note in my box this morning:

Angie,

I love the way Stepping Stones is affecting our church community. Families are taking time to talk about faith, ask questions, and get involved in the life of the church. Everyone is having so much fun! I wish that this program would have been around when my kids were young--it would have made a huge difference. Is there any way that my husband and I (as grandparents) can get involved in this program now?

Blessings!

My response:

Grandparents involved in Stepping Stones? Great idea! This program would provide an opportunity not only for grandparents and grandchildren to develop a special bond, it would also strengthen the bond between the grandparents and their children. It's never too late to start talking with your kids about faith and life and love and hopes and dreams! So here's a challenge to all of you grandparents out there: get involved! Bring your children and grandchildren to Stepping Stone events. Start talking! Or, if you can't bring your own family, then adopt one--there are many families involved in Stepping Stones who have grandparents that for one reason or another can't participate in this amazing program. They would love to have surrogate grandparents to share their highs and lows! Give me a call and we'll get you started.

Blessings to you, too. And thanks for asking.

Angie

The Saints of God

All Saints Day: one of those holidays that (thankfully) hasn't been taken over by the card companies. It's a holiday that we can remember the saints in our lives without buying presents or decorating the house. It's a holiday that we can remember the saints in our lives with a moment of prayer, a time of remembrance, a word of thanksgiving. No fanfare. No poetry. Not even a bouquet of flowers. Just a 'thank you'.

So to all of you who raised me in the church, prayed for me, taught me the stories of faith, led lives that showed that life wasn't about money and power but was about love and forgiveness: thank you. To those who encouraged me to wrestle with God's call (and not run away from God's call): thank you. To those who continue to be patient with my impatience, point out that God is still speaking, and that I am not alone: thank you. To those who have gone before me and those who will come behind me, carrying the flame of faith, trying to do God's work in whatever way they can: thank you.

Happy All Saints Day.